Can micro-interactions make us happier?

When we think about who we want to spend time with, where and how we will do this, to feel a sense of connection, I expect it’s mainly about planned events. These might be through work, volunteering, our family, social circles or community groups.  

But what might be the impact of micro-interactions on making us feel happier and less lonely? A passing and unplanned interaction that makes us feel more connected to other humans, even if superficially and momentarily.

In her book, The Lonely Century, Noreen Hertz highlights a study carried out by University of British Colombia sociologists Gillian Sandstrom and Elizabeth Dunn, “to investigate whether ‘micro-interactions’ had a quantifiable impact on people’s wellbeing”. They recruited customers coming into an urban Starbucks to either be friendly and make conversation with their barista, or to be efficient and avoid unnecessary conversation.

Even with only 30 seconds of friendly conversation, the researchers found that the customers involved in the “‘friendly’ group reported higher levels of happiness as well as a greater sense of connection to those around them”. It is proposed that being friendly increases the likelihood of the recipient responding in a friendly manner, and that the act of being friendly itself can provide an “emotional boost”.   

How might you create or make the most of a micro-interaction opportunity?

Could you forgo the convenience of the self-service checkout in the supermarket and spend a few more minutes’ chatting with the person staffing your checkout? Or if you have your shopping delivered, could you have a brief chat with your driver and ask how their day has been?

Dog walkers can often be friendly towards each other, and I expect many will be happy to have their dog complimented or asked about, whether you have a dog with you or not.

Do you live in an area where you bump into people you know? If you want that sense of community and connection, how might this influence future considerations of where you live?

Challenge yourself to daily micro-interactions for a week and let me know how you get on. I’d love to know what you tried and how it made you feel. Contact me here.

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