I hate being told what to do
As you can see by the title, I feel very strongly about being told what to do.
I hate it. Always have.
Especially when I feel misunderstood, or someone else’s experiences and circumstances are different to mine.
It doesn’t mean that either of us is necessarily right or wrong, but the assumption that I ‘must’ feel and act in the same way as them frustrates me.
Or at least that’s the polite language I’ll use here.
So how do we stick to our own path and make our own decisions?
And how do we react, or manage not to overreact, to other people’s assumptions, expectations and projections about how we live our lives?
This is what I tell myself and my clients. You are welcome to take it or leave it.
Try to listen objectively to what is being said. You might hear something useful that initial kneejerk emotions make it harder to accept.
If it is hitting a nerve, pause and consider whether there’s some truth or concern to it, and what you may need to do to address these challenges in your own way.
Whether there are challenges or not, take a breath, remember what is important to you, and the outcome you want and how this impacts your decision-making.
Recognise that other people are on their own path, you may even want to celebrate them, but state calmly and clearly that your needs and approach may be different.
If you’re still not feeling heard, and this is more about someone else’s fears or attitude than your own, change the subject or leave.
Ask yourself, is this a situation where you need to change someone’s mind, or can you let it go and not let it derail or upset your path?
If you’d like support to make your own decisions about the next stage of your life, to challenge assumptions and expectations, wherever they may come from, get in touch for a conversation about how we can work together.
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